Part 5
It's early summer. The weather is on the whole warm if not hot, the grass is still green, not yet turning brown. My garden is taking shape and the promise of long hot summer holidays is just around the corner.
I'm very busy working at my full time job & establishing Fairy Free Cakes, so everyone else in our residence has to keep the house ticking over so I don't have to do that as well. My husband does a great job at this.
I've just separated the kids because they were play fighting and it got out of control again. It happens every single time. But they still carry on right then. Then one gets properly hurt even though it has been suggested frequently that they give each other a little space so as not to injure further. Do they? No. How idiotic is that??
Mother's day was a couple of months ago now. Mother's day is a weird one for me. On one hand I like it when the children showed some gratitude or appreciation for what i do for them. On the other hand I dont feel I deserve any because I get it so spectacularly wrong 99% of the time. Not just a bit wrong, very very wrong. My tone of voice has always been a thorn in my side. Hubby says I'm not as bad as I think and that I'm getting much better at parenting, hmm maybe. 🙄
For me, being a parent is not a gift but a lesson from God. I don't know what the lesson is to teach me, a multitude of things I expect, but I still don't like being a mum. There are far too many days when a teary distressed me internally screams 'Aaaaaaaaaaargh I ******* hate this!' 😠😧☹ðŸ˜
We have come to the very definate united decision that it is better all round for our family for me to go out to work & do all the out of the house stuff and daniel to be the parent. That way everyone stays alive and we stay married.
So what do I think now of being a parent? Honestly? It's the ****est job in the world. I would in all truthfulness rather have a job cleaning up animal dung all day long.
Would I do it all again? NO WAY!
Only if my life literally depended on it would I want to swap places and be the main child rearer. No no no, give me a full time job outside the home any day.
The boys aren't bad kids, they are children doing what children do, but of course boys have an added sprinkling of loony.
The boys are eagerly awaiting the end of term so they can spend the long summer holidays at the beach, ready to run out the door at any given moment, the surf boards are already in the porch and have been since the Easter holidays when they disappointedly got back out of the sea because it was too cold even though we'd already told them it would be. There's a surprise!
I look back to my own school summer holidays. Long lazy days filled with riding my bike up and down the road we lived in, playing with the girls next door or the kids up the road & being bored out of my brain after 2 weeks.
Oh to be a kid again.
